Lovense brings AI to the bedroom with real-time moan translation and fake orgasm detection

In today’s episode of “things we didn’t know we needed,” sex tech company Lovense has announced a new feature that might just change the game in the bedroom: Real-Time Moan Translation.

According to a press release shared this week, the company is working on an AI-powered feature for its Lovense Remote App that can literally listen to the sounds of passion and translate them into plain, everyday language. The idea? To help couples “decode the language of intimacy”, from sighs to gasps to moans, so there’s no more guesswork in the bedroom.

Lovense says its app will be able to detect what a “soft moan” or “sudden pause” means, then translate it into simple feedback like “Go faster” or “Let’s try a different position.”

Even more jaw-dropping is that the app can read those translations in your partner’s voice, thanks to built-in voice mimicry. So yes, you could technically have AI whisper “right there” in the same voice as your lover, even when they’re halfway across the country.

And because Lovense clearly decided subtlety was overrated, the feature will also include what it calls a “fake orgasm detector.” The company claims the AI will offer insights into whether your partner’s pleasure is genuine or, well, “just for show.”

To make things even more interactive, the app will reportedly drop live suggestions like “Ease up the pressure” or “Slow the rhythm” as things heat up, all in the name of helping couples “find their perfect groove.”

“Lovense can translate the universal language of desire into feedback couples can understand,” a company spokesperson said. “It’s playful, experimental, and all about creating better connection and interaction in the bedroom.”

The feature is currently in development, with a beta program coming soon for those “adventurous users” ready to test it out.

Now, we’ve seen some wild AI ideas in our time. From smart toothbrushes to fridge cameras, but this might take the cake. Because let’s be honest, “AI that detects fake orgasms” is a sentence you don’t read every day. And if you’re wondering, yes, it works with or without Bluetooth headphones, so there’s really no hiding behind that excuse.

Whether it’s a groundbreaking innovation or just clever marketing, Lovense has definitely found the one thing that gets everyone’s attention online: moans, but make it tech.